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A dream An ambition "can you tell me what you want to be one day?" "tell your friends what is your dream" "please write your name and your ambition so i can record in my student's profile" you know what, i am so afraid with that question since primary school. i used to have a dream but not now. i do not know why that things happen. when i am getting older, my mind will blur when think about it. always pray hard for lect/teacher not asking me that kind of question because it is gonna take a few hours (or a year maybe) for me to reply it :') ended up gonna say i want to be a teacher (facepalm) hello??? me as a teacher??? even people keep asking something repeatly, gonna mad at them and ask them to solve it by themself (yes sorry because i am so selfish) but when i do the same things to people, i will feel guilty and thought they will think same things like me :') i used to have a dream when i was 11 years old which is i want to be a ...

in this age i feel i am old enough and i can not believe i challange myself in this age even i feel shocked with myself is this ain? the home person? the person that hate to challenge herself? the person always live in her imagination? the person only think about kpop? (sometime still do it 🙈) the person that always overthinking? wow so impress! i shook-ed! maybe people gonna think it is just a normal things but idk because sometime i did not understand with myself always afraid to do something even yes, still feeling afraid for everything but that have a little bit confident right now when i feel down i said to myself "just ignore it ain!" "that's your life!" "nobody care about you or if they talk bad about you, just ignore it" wow since when i can think like that?? the positive person? wow lol ok gonna list what i do in this age first, take a car license almost give up doh but think about my parents i try my ...

3 August 2017 a few days ago, i didn't feel anything. idky because i should feel nervous but nahh i am into k-drama so much. everyone keep saying "weh nervous doh" "macam mana ni weh, tak lalu nak makan dah ni". sorry guys. masa u guys wassap me, aku tengah makan ayam :') so back to this date. 10 minit je lagi tepat pukul 12. niat nak check at 1pm sbb nak habiskan episode 9 this drama (fyi i am watching Defendant. yeahh i know i am late sorry) but fardhu already check it and she said to me untuk pergi check gak the result. berlagak je nak tunggu pukul 1pm. baru pukul 12.15pm dah suruh fardhu check kan. she called me with screaming. man chill i can't hear you. so i go out my room and listen what she want to say. "U!!! WE GOT SAME UNI AND SAME COURSE YOU!!!!" this is dream aight? man do not lie to me now and she freaking scream said yes. me as always the pondan one crying lah like a drama. so back to room while sobbing and my grandma aske...

you know what the things i hate but sometime i do it? it is called 'Obsess'. what those mean? obsess with something useless but i enjoy it sometime and it's make me worry right now. i do not want this habit forever. i really do hate it but why?? why am i enjoying? please ain. give up with it. right now, with this age old enough (but... can i stay young forever 👉👈) obsess with many things. one of them, the dangerous one are 'SOCIAL MEDIA'. that things gave me more negative vibes right now. i think blogger also but nahh i really enjoy it but still i need to control it. why suddenly i say like that? ok let's me tell u girl. i do not know it is just me or other people have thought about it. first, instagram. yes i have instagram and i did not allow people who i do not know to follow me. because imma gonna overthinking when they check my ig feed. "oh did they gonna look at my feed?"   "will they ever think to like it or not?"   ...