20 years old

-
in this age
i feel i am old enough
and i can not believe
i challange myself in this age
even i feel shocked with myself
is this ain?
the home person?
the person that hate to challenge herself?
the person always live in her imagination?
the person only think about kpop?
(sometime still do it 🙈)
the person that always overthinking?


wow
so impress!
i shook-ed!
maybe people gonna think
it is just a normal things
but idk
because sometime i did not understand with myself
always afraid to do something
even yes, still feeling afraid for everything
but that have a little bit confident right now

when i feel down
i said to myself
"just ignore it ain!"
"that's your life!"
"nobody care about you or if they talk bad about you, just ignore it"
wow since when i can think like that??
the positive person?
wow
lol

ok gonna list what i do in this age
first, take a car license
almost give up doh
but think about my parents
i try my best to get it
even failed for 3 times 😂
second, enrolled to university
hello?!?
never imagined it doh
because i thought i am so stupid
even when stpm result released
i still did not believe i can do well
to get the good result
and now here i am
in upnm
studying as university's student

yeah i know baru 2 minggu
but still can not believe it 😂😂
third, do a medical checkup
alone guyss
alone without parents
almost cry weh
but i do not want show my nervous
afraid get the bad result
walaupun payah nak ambik darah
but try become positive

fourth, back to seremban alone
alone weh!!
ok ok benda ni normal
maaf sebab macam over je
but still proud with myself
*tap my own head*
ok lastly lah
i become more positive person (?)
i think lah
lol
i try my best to ignore negative vibes
and try my best to solve it by myself
huhu

remember i used to say i like the new ain before?
so i thought that ain will forever like that
but nahh
all new things can be old right?
so this is new ain again
even there are many challenges i must overcame
but i still survive doh
hahahaha
ok bye!

p/s: i am so sorry that i am not gonna talk about my orientation week because i feel i do not have time to publish about it. but i already do some draft about it. i am so sorry 🙏

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